Sun Seeker

It's been a rough week.

Physically, emotionally, and atmospherically

The closest I've seen to sunlight was last Saturday, running down to the market.

Even that was more just a lightening of the cloud

Double run on Saturday, then in to Mississauga on Sunday to do some more exploring..

..on another chilly, grey day.

It was a little tougher than I was expecting; I hadn't realized quite how much of a valley the Credit River sits in.

If vert isn't real, it's doing one heck of a job of faking its existence

Nor had I realized how gnarly some of the trails around it might be.

Don't trip on the way down.

Fun fact: every rock moves underfoot

As difficult as that was physically, at least it offered peace and tranquility on which I'd draw that evening.

..when we scattered my father's ashes on Lake Ontario, at the mouth of the Credit River.
Both had brought him sustaining joy from his boyhood through his adult life.

Monday and Tuesday passed with work - long hours and more grey, chilly weather, which hung around for Wednesday when we headed back to Mississauga for what we thought would be the last time.

I took the chance to finish a project: see all but the road sections of the Culham Trail, that my father used to walk daily before his passing.

I've no idea which section(s) his walks covered, but hope my travels took me along his footsteps at least for a little way.

In spite of the continued chill and overcast - plus my fatigue after too many days without proper sleep - I desperately needed that run for the day that was to come. Have you ever seen a house that's been lived in for fifty years straight by the same person? Eight hours of rummaging, searching, finding, packing, toting, moving, loading, unloading, arranging, and unpacking later, I was completely exhausted..

..and yet knew I wasn't done yet.

The move had not been completed as planned, but the actual moving crew had done all they intended and would not be back: I quickly messaged my manager, who was very understanding about giving me another day off work so I could go back to Mississauga with my mum to find and transport all of the other things that had been missed, or that my mother hadn't wanted to bring that had been packed anyway.

Deep breaths

If Wednesday was exhausting and disheartening, Thursday was a true nightmare. Once again I got a run in first, while the fog still lay heavy on the trails near home.

I could have slept a bit more had I not, but the centering it gave me was probably the only thing that got me through.

Another more than 9 hours of searching, packing, strained tempers, careful arranging and re-arranging to try to fit everything in our vehicle, unloading, unpacking, and sorting out - with everyone tired, sore, and after just a bowl of post-run oatmeal at 9:30am, we finally staggered out at almost 7pm.

We grabbed some take out and headed for home.

If that wasn't enough for the day, upon getting in the house we found our tomcat Fionn displaying the classic signs of a urinary tract blockage: something that could kill him in less than 48hrs if left untreated. I was a wreck: watching my poor boy like a hawk, trying to call our vet's office (that literally closed as I was making the call at 7:59pm), pulling out the carrier to take him to the emergency vet, and then finally seeing him improve to almost normal within minutes of a difficult but successful trip to the litter box! 

I was so grateful to see him feeling better! We decided - given observations - to monitor today and take him to our own vet if he still seemed to be having issues, but he's been absolutely fine.

So finally - around 9:30pm, after a really thorough shower - I got to collapse on the couch and eat the dinner we'd picked up.

I've often thought that days like these - where you're exhausted and everything feels impossible, but you've no choice but to keep moving forward through it - make some good training for ultras. Having faced difficult times in the past can teach you to draw on your reserves to do difficult things in the future.

Let me tell you: I'm feeling a little over-prepared by now

Fortunately the worst ought to be done now, and I should have fewer worries going forward as my mum is now much closer at hand, and able to get any assistance she needs far more easily than alone in a house full of stairs.

What I'd never do for money, I will do for love - but now I need some rest, and maybe a little sunshine...please?